Thursday, September 11, 2014

Who you love? You or your children!

I met an old friend after years and we talked about family, relationships and compromises over some beer. As our talk delved into seriousness, we talked about children and their future. Of course, I don’t have any now! He is a father of two beautiful girls. We then got into talking about the future of his girls. He expects his daughters to look after him when old and frail. I retaliated saying how can you expect your children to do that? Kids change and they change fast and I could put this shrewd fact into his brains.

Men marry in haste and women in curiosity! At least that’s what I have mostly found out to be. You have put on so much effort to keep your raison d’ĂȘtre intact of being in love, getting married and having children.

Upon comparison, friends declare, I have my kid in the 3rd grade. I think you and others like you will have children when you grow old and who will look after you. I don’t know but I am not expecting my children to look after me when I am old. What worth are you when you as the supposed bread winner can’t secure an old age retirement scheme besides securing your children’s future!

Expecting your young to look after you is absurd in today’s natural world. I don’t want to offend the ones who do look after their parents now with passion. But the fact is, will all of today’s children be a responsible adult in future?  I cannot even imagine how will be mine!
In a fairly traditional family set up like ours, the supposed husbands or ‘Magpas’ don’t have the right when it comes to the wife’s family affairs. This system has been hereditary and people still hold onto such belief no matter however modern one is. The townspeople now may find this ridiculous but ask any country bumpkin about this practice. The wealth of the family should be kept within the family-that’s why the women folks not the men.

The point is people change, time changes, generations change and with it changes occur in every sphere of one’s life. So it’s high time that parents now must work a little extra to save it for the grey old days for themselves, otherwise you never know! And expecting your children to look after you when frail is now a thing of the past. Also, you cannot even defend for sure whether or not you child will be there to home you later in life! Perhaps a huge food for thought and a thing to ponder upon!

Will you now start working for the benefit of you and your children?

PS: This is just a lopsided opinion of my conversation with an old mate and readers can draw your own conclusions about the future of your own besides working for your children’s future.


  1. Nicely written Lobzang sir...Loved to read your article ...

  2. While I fully agree that people are changing with which things are changing, but I still bear a hope that one's own children would look after when his/her parents becomes frail with age. That hope I believe would be present in many parents and to-be-parents. Per se that could reason they'd have children. Just my personal opinion. Thanks.

  3. Would look after meant a lot and I too hope young these days instill this duty in them...

  4. I believe with sir. It's sad to learn many children avoid their thanking parents. But I won't avoid my parents.

  5. That's very sweet of you Jigme. Please do that! This was the reason why I wrote this update!