Is getting late, getting laid?

Note:I am writing this because most of my friends who were happily married once are unhappily divorced now. Not one or two but many in counting and two are at the crossroads of filing a legal battle with each other. In the following I have voiced out my opinions on the stories they shared. 

Here’s a thought to ponder upon! Why do some people don’t even take a split second to go back to the primitive ape age? They react so angrily and without giving a thought to it, they jump to conclusions not wondering opportunities and options available. Some have rigid attitudes and some too flexible to be naïve. Others take pride in keeping their spouse at their finger tips like the Alpha male and Alpha female for packs of wolves.  This is the evolution of our family systems. Families kept us bonded for generations and this bond is becoming weak with modernization. I suppose time will heal everything.

The life cycle revolves around doing ones nine to five job, getting home and spending time with family. This is the rigid and accepted practice. Otherwise the fairer gender at home will be smoking red with anger. At times, don’t we get late? Or we purposefully want to get ‘late’ for reasons other than getting ‘laid’. Oops! And if one’s not home frequently on the time one leaves office, in the mind of the one at home, it’s surely getting laid. What a preconceived and subconscious thought? Insecurity breeds with familiarity. I have come across such beings and they teach hard, that family is not everyone’s cup of tea. Not for now at least! 

The evolution of Bhutanese practices on family has been the tool that kept families together and I read it years ago that people marry within the blood line not to let the wealth go out. If this is not happening now, certainly some fragments of this cultural practice must be alive. I am a Sharchop and some scorn at the very name. I have a reason to be mocked at because long ago our ancestors had the culture of marrying ones cousins-the golden cousins. Ask any easterner about it! This has become a debatable issue and for modernists, marrying within a blood line would be taboo. 

Google images

This takes me years back to my college days, where an extempore speaker declared, “Women marry in haste and men with curiosity”. If divorce was what fate had in store for them (my friends), certainly it was a curable-mistake to have seen the person good to you playing the role of a humble spouse. If this is what you like not to believe, please refer to the legal issues and hassles handled by the judiciary in our country. It’s staggering-in all sense of the word. 

Dear friends, play safe and don’t let your spouse think that GETTING LATE has something to do with GETTING LAID or vice versa.

Happy living folks!

Uncle Bajay!

It’s been pretty long since I haven’t updated my blog and it is partly the rain that is to blame because it kept me indoors and occupied on chores. And it was during one of those rainy days that something caught my eye. A bottle of beer-which today’s generation might have even forgotten that it once was a hip drink for all drink-a-likes! 

The Golden Eagle beer which was long gone from the Bhutanese bars and market is alive at Mr. Bajay’s hotel. Just a bottle remains as his show piece. If you have gone through my book, “Beyond the call of daily life”, I have this man mentioned on the very onset of the book. Mr. Bajay’s real name is Pema Dhendup. He comes from the tiny little village of Tama, Zhemgang. He earns his living running two hotels and a furniture house right in the town of Zhemgang. He is survived by four kids. 

Mr. Bajay is a familiar face and he was the first Zhemgang resident that I knew when I came to this unknown place. He comforted me with all advises when I was heartbroken supposedly for being sent to a remote school. Now, he and I are minutes apart and we have many characteristics in common. We share seven long years of  friendship. He was a devout reader and his knowledge on the flora and fauna stands testimony to this fact. He tells me his love for reading is diminishing by the day. He has a small collection of books which makes an onlooker wonder-An all knowing being.

Uncle Bajay with his Souvenir

He idolizes the great minds of the world including some of our former ministers. The wisdom of great inspirational leaders and the good things they did to our country lights him up, then I follow suit. And why shouldn’t I? After all, if something good needs to be followed as an example, no morality check up would deny not to. 

His skill in cookery is yet another mentionable quality. He is a learner at this skill. All the ordinary dishes that we encounter in today’s hotels are obvious but his skill and knowledge on food goes beyond the conventional food preparing process. He shows me some sauces which I haven’t heard or seen before. With his talks on various subjects and issues, I let a few gulps down my throat. I am a documentary movie enthusiast and whenever I get hold of a new documentary movie, I make sure I pass onto him as he too has an undying thirst for knowledge.

He frequently asks me on the English words and phrases that he doesn’t quite understand and he tells me my explanations can make a retard understand, hence, the teacher-ship which I pursue. He was educated until middle school and during his formative days he was reputed to be Zhemgang’s only ‘nine-chuck’ expert. 

On one usual evening, having read an entire page on Obama’s consideration for South East Asia, he was lost and I had to tell a summary on the story to which he even now remembers what he learnt. A naturally born-to-learn learner! His outlook on learning makes him an all knowing saint. But when it comes to computers, he lags a little.

And in evenings…

As customers heats up in discussion on various subjects, he will humbly come listen to the discussion holding an orange mug to which he already might have poured in some pegs of the familiar ‘Special Courier’ whisky. This is Mr. Pema Dhendup commonly, Uncle Bajay.

Chasing Time

It makes me wonder that I have now come afar in life and yet I still do have dissatisfaction and reservations over some things that have been done. I wish to undo it if I ever have the opportunity to go back in time. Time is what is not on my side. Folks, do you have time? Honestly, ask that critically to yourself. Finding time!

Where is the time to make all endeavors possible? Some years ago, I read this in a popular magazine, “We have time to do all the nothing we want”. If we revisit the story of Genghis Khan, at his death bed he summoned his court and asked missionaries to be sent around the Mongol empire to bring in the person who can extend his time on earth. He wanted time. 

Courtesy: Google Images

Physicists around the world still wonder on the aspects of time and space and there is one question that they are trying to answer, “What is time?” Is it a space where imagination takes precedence over reality? From the ‘Big bang’ until this day, who has known this illusive concept of time? Ask the western world about how short is time? They are busy and they don’t have time for anything. If a train arrives late by 30 seconds, the days schedule for the entire commuters gets delayed by 30 seconds. 

According to the Hindu theory of creation, time (Sanskrit 'kal') is a manifestation of God. Creation begins when God makes his energies active and ends when he withdraws all his energies into a state of inactivity. God is timeless, for time is relative and ceases to exist in the Absolute. The past, the present and the future coexist in him simultaneously.

Nobody has enough time, although some may opine superficially that I manage time. It is imperative that managing time is and will remain as elusive as time itself. Individual differs with time and in managing time. Let us learn from the following wisdom from the book "Lord of the rings".

“I wish it need not have happened in my time," said Frodo.
"So do I," said Gandalf, "and so do all who live to see such times. But that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given us.”
― J.R.R. Tolkien, the Fellowship of the Ring

The unsung hero of Zhemgang LSS!

Disclaimer: I have written briefly about a person whom I know and this write up is in no way intended to defame him. It is perfectly out of the urge to write something and reader’s discretion is advised. I sought his permission to write about him and it’s granted. My thanks to Kunzang T for suggesting the title. Happy reading!

Perhaps an admonition that one is not great unless one is above the other and being above means a lot of things. This is a write up on a personality which truly makes one feel how can this person say, “Yes” to all. A few years ago I wrote a book, “beyond the call of daily life” in which a chapter is written solely for Nidup Wangdi, the caretaker of Degala CPS. I have described him in detail and I meet him even now when he comes for official purposes to the Dzongkhag office. I named him the Good Samaritan. 

This morning I took some pictures of flowers and in my trial of getting a perfect shot, I stumbled upon Indra Bdr. Rai, the caretaker of Zhemgang LSS. I see him every day going about his daily chores at the school. Usually he frequents the Bank for deposits and withdrawals of other teacher colleagues, as for me I am a broke teacher. LOL! 

Every morning, he (at times his wife) comes to the respective classrooms bringing notices, letters, substitution for classes etc. and nobody thinks out of the box about the work he’s doing. This thought caught me and I had three free periods. That’s when I thought of writing about him, with his due permission, of course!

Indra Daju

Indra Bdr. Rai commonly known ‘Indra Daju’ is survived by 4 kids and the eldest is in the IVth grade. He belongs to Dagana. He first came to Zhemgang as a worker for the PWD and later became a bull dozer operator. He later became a gardener in Zhemgang Dzong before joining Zhemgang LSS in 2000. I am quite versed in the Lhotsamkha dialect and this information is a direct result of the interview I had with him. He tells me it’s hard for him to make ends meet and after curtailing the hard earned money it’s just enough to survive. He also takes care of his mother residing with him. He is a hard worker, deeply religious and a helping personality. He is Indra Daju, our school caretaker. Perhaps, another Good Samaritan! 

I have written this in appreciation of all caretakers across all schools in our country for the wonderful job they are doing however small it may be.