Some deserve to be Guillotined

Disclaimer: I am sorry for the rude and insolent words that I have used in my update and very sorry for the wacky title as well.

On my way to the famous Sabji Bazaar, just while negotiating a turn, my spouse cries, “Aiee” in a pity tone. I too looked and I was amazed at what I saw.

A middle-aged woman with an infant in her lap, just by glance, the baby in her lap wouldn’t be more than six months old. I have a baby who is of the same size and perhaps might be of the same age.  The woman had her face swollen and she was injured in her head as well. She was there holding her baby and her half swollen face asking for people’s help. When I went back to see her, there were already people around her offering cash. I still cannot digest this unusual sight of a mother with her baby begging for alms. This is an unusual observation that I made while on a visit to the Farmers Market to buy some provisions.

The baby’s dad was nowhere in sight. Where is he on earth? What made him abandon his blood? How would he feel if he sees this sight? I am a father now and I perfectly understand the ordeal and hardship in raising a child without a dad. How would that supposed dad feel if he was to be in his mom’s lap and begging for alms? Be it legitimate or else otherwise, doesn’t he feel the pinch of his blood and wife sitting in the middle of a busy walkway, seeking people’s help, whom she doesn’t know at all. I despise the man who left them with nothing but to beg.

I am not a maestro in marital affairs and its legalities but thinking of the baby one should re-unite. Either of the spouses may be wrong but thinking of the baby in between, the spouses should keep their differences aside and settle down with a consensus. Isn’t this a life worth living for? I do believe in second chances but there is always a choice to make. This world revolves and runs around the word, ‘Mother’. It’s very disheartening to have seen such a sight and for the supposed daddy, it is even more excruciating to believe that such people do have a place among us.

This sight of a mother and her kid brought tears to my eyes instantly and I couldn’t get a good sleep last night.  What good are you when you can’t provide for your own blood? Perhaps, this man might not have heard, “Blood is thicker than water”. This sight touched me so much that I have fallen short of words to express my emotions.

Folks, I am sorry for the blur picture as I took it from a moving car. This update of mine makes the 100^th update on my blog and to term it, it’s a century update. Instead of jubilation and elation over the century update, my heart wept in pain thinking of the mother and her sleeping infant. Just on a pensive note, I would have guillotined the person responsible for leaving a mother and her kid to their fate…

The Reading Mantra!

I never saw the person who named my daughter Tenzin Euden and I heard his name quite often from my spouse’s mouth until last night. I saw him teaching and giving speech to RTC students, why RTC? I saw my former Lopen TS Powdyel seated in the front row. That’s when my wife said, dear he is the person who named our daughter and he is, pardon me if I got his name wrong, Drupwang Sangye Nyingma Rimpoche. Thank you Rimpoche for naming her Tenzin Euden! I listened to all your talks on what BBS had already recorded. I was taken aback when Rimpoche mentioned that he learned to speak English all by himself and he completely forgot Dzongkha. He was taken to study in a Tibetan monastery at the age of three. 

Rimpoche’s profound talks on youth matters made me rethink what path I chose hereafter… His talks took me years back to the novel ‘Sense and Sensibility’. Rimpoche talked on degeneration of Dzongkha and it is indeed an irony that I also feel comfortable communicating in English. Dzongkha had been my weakness since my childhood. I can hardly remember reading Dzongkha literature besides the texts that were provided back then…

For this year, it’s the national reading year and this initiative is commendable on the MoE’s part. What I cannot understand is why only for a year? The readership among the urbanites and educated people has taken a back seat, due to the obvious technology. Technology must enhance reading but sadly it’s the other way around. 

I had this opportunity to meet writers and bloggers in Thimphu and I was particularly asked by one MP, Dasho SangayKhandu, why do you think is the trend that most parents have no reading habits, although highly qualified. I felt dumbstruck but my humble reply to him was, “Parents are bogged down with their own profession”. I may be wrong but this is what I had to say. I am teacher for those whom I don’t know and I teach English…

Google images

My stand on the reading ability and proficiency in any language is to do with the linguistic background one belongs to. You see I am a born Sharchop, I learned English in schools and Dzongkha as a national language. We belong to a multi-lingual society and language acquisition theory is based solely on nurture-nature idea, meaning what you acquire and what you learn! As an English teacher, I must say English is not at all an easy language. English is the medium of instruction all over the world and that’s why people find it comfortable. Going by the complexities in any language, English is difficult. A Bhutanese speaking in English has errors and I accept that because we learned English as a second language and second language learners have this difficulty all over the world. But at the same time, I was astonished to see and learn that most young people prefer reading English over Dzongkha books. Great!

The reading ability in a child is sparked not by intelligence by something called ‘modeling’. Psychology students must be aware of what modeling is. It is simply modeling reading behaviors at home. We Bhutanese are so used to saying I tried many a time but it failed. A child has to make connections on what he/she is read to and what connections his/her brain make while reading. As adults it is very easy to read children’s books to kids but kids will have difficulty understanding your reading. So reading requires patience for the umpteenth time until a child gets through what is being read. Gradually when a child is interested in listening to reading, then his/her curiosity will emerge into beginning reading. If this is done you have done your share in making a child read on his/her interest. 

As a teacher, my suggestion for parents is to read to your kid over and over again. Also to the system at large, please don’t make reading a national event only for a year, follow through year after year because my former Lopen Jose KC once remarked in a literature class, “If something is worth telling, it must be told twice”.

Good day folks!

One of Bhutan’s Microwaves: Punakha!

The ceiling fans moving all night wouldn’t cool the blanketing hot room air and wouldn’t deter the mosquitoes that sang all through the night. In a hot place when you are served penny-pinching meals, one doesn’t feel like eating despite the volcanic appetite and the nausea only heightens when water from the tap is warm. Getting into a car would be the last thing you would do on a hot summer day.  It’s like getting into a microwave.

I have been to Punakha on several occasions and perhaps this time my opinion of this historic place will be a little gawky considering the weather at this time of the year. Everything in Punakha is about beauty, simplicity and elegance like any other places in western Bhutan. The only worrying thing about Punakha at this time of the year is the scorching heat! I was a resident of P/Ling and Chukha for all these years and the heat didn’t bother me as it did in Punakha. I had never experienced such irritation in life.

Just recently I had this opportunity to witness the signing of the constitution of Bhutan’s first Children’s Parliament. A noble move perhaps and I do hope that this initiative brings out efficient leaders and citizens in future. We did this in the Kuenrey of the famous Punakha Dzong. This Dzong is still nothing short of an awe inspiring structure.

The signing ceremony began, one by one the student representatives from all over Bhutan put a sign on an elegant book and the coordinators were just there to witness this moment. Children had to walk in the heat for rehearsal from Punakha HSS till the Dzong and back. My student representative didn’t eat a decent meal while in Punakha. She had a worrisome time with the food and the lodge.

To add to the agony of sweating that I was into, we were asked to bring Tshog-Lham (Traditional Boot). A woven Gho with a TshogLham in an already packed room with temperature outside rocketing by the moment, I was thinking, hell has broken lose. I thought I was the only one experiencing this but to my relief, others beside me were undergoing the same. It was much worse for the teachers who had the habit of chewing our very own infamous ‘Doma’. The stinks from Doma further reassured the already rising nausea in me. The heat made me take short naps while the session was on and the coordinators beside me whom I have never seen, one in particular a chubby colorful lady was looking at me as she was on a mission to crucify me.

It was historical to witness the gathering but I felt equally irksome about the heat. I was roasted; toasted, baked, scorched, parched, seared…you name it. My tryst with Punakha was being cooked up in a microwave oven! 

The Sin of Life

I find this very interesting in our culture. And some things in our culture is worth writing it down. I am wondering if people and researchers have done any research and writings on the concept of “Tshe-Nga-Mey-Ley” (Sin of one’s previous life). Look around and just listen to people’s hearsay, this phrase is cited for all mishaps and wrong doings. 

Over meetings with my friends in the evenings, just last night we talked about a special child born to a known parent, the child suffers from cerebral palsy. Dechen, instantly tells its ‘Tshe-nga-mey-ley’. The females have all the reason to believe in ‘Tshe-nga-mey-ley’. I got thoroughly confused with this tshengamey ley thing in our culture.

I know a personality that I don’t like and I cannot do anything about it. The world around me knows of this person and everyone has nothing good to say about it. I know I cannot help but write it down. My ordeal is what my friends term it as “Tshe-nga-mey-ley”.

If something doesn’t go well or is frustratingly a failure then we have a tendency to blame it on the past life and actions. If a mishap happens supposedly, just a month ago I lost my spare tyre and my buddies tell me, “Khemey, ken dhoJoWong” (its ok, a calamity is averted). Things happen for reasons known and unknown. Does it mean ‘Tshengemey ley’ is to be blamed? I am not a devout person who is abreast with the customs and religion of our country and I just know I am a plain Buddhist.

Picture Courtesy: Google

I am a divorcee and tshengamey ley is definitely not the reason. I nearly got mauled by a bear in remote Zhemgang and it too wasn’t tshengamey ley. Due to some mechanical failures, a truck veered off a cliff killing dozens in the east, just recently in the news and my mom opines, “Ai tshenga ma ga ley giwala”. Not to forget the tragedy in Nepal, was this too a Tshengamey ley of the Nepalese people?How naïve?  How obvious?

My stand on this is not to go against the cultural aspect of tshengamey ley but my reasoning is limited to my knowledge. It just avoids the trouble. I mean if mishaps or a wrong doing occurs, tshengamey ley is cited, blamed or whatever but this avoids the troubles and it’s a phrase used to console self. Any one has any other interesting ideas on tshengamey ley, I would love to read it. Until the next update on my blog, let’s see what tshengamey ley has in store for me?

Good day folks.

All in a days’ work!

Yesterday, I took a day off from the daily humdrum of the holy office to spend time with my little Tenzin. We had an appointment arranged on this day for some tests at the Bio-chemistry laboratory at JDWNRH. And then to the school of astrology at Pangrizampa for my baby’s Kay-Tse (I don’t know how appropriate this might sound).

It was just for an hour or so that I had to wait. The agony of already waiting in lines for your turn to come is nerve racking. And holding my baby at the same time made me imagine, my arms would break apart any moment. After an agonizing wait, there was no one to take the sample. Another half an hour went by until a bear-like man in white coat appeared. He held my baby’s foot so tight that I could not resist. She wept on top of her voice and I nearly broke down. That’s when I intervened, “Can’t you be a little gentle with that?” He kept silent. Had he uttered something, I was determined to smack some of his teeth out. His silence pardoned me the trouble.

Next stop, Pangrizampa! We took some offerings and requested a teacher-monk for the Kay-Tse. He agreed and after a gruesome exchange on some fees, he accepted finally reiterating that we Bhutanese politely decline and accept everything in the end.

རང་གི་ཨ་ལོ་སྔུནི་དོན་ཧིང་ན།། རོགས་ཀྱི་ཨ་ལོ་སྔུནི་རྣཝ་ཚ།།

This maxim came as a great help to me and it’s like saying only the wearer knows where the shoe pinches. For me this realization came all in a day’s work.

Although, I was deeply emotional and passionate about my time with her, she just slept for the entire day sometimes smiling and crying in her sleep. All experiences sums up to all in a days’ work.

Happy reading folks!

My Little Tenzin

This thought came to me just last night-What am I doing? Move forward buddy and you are just as young! Your other half is being selfish! She wants her family and parents but not her daughters’ dad. So I decided to write this little poem for my little Tenzin who happens to be with her mother although I long to spend every second of my life with my little Tenzin, once again I wouldn’t have her exchanged for anything in this world. I love you Tenzin!

                                          Dear Tenzin,

I love you Tenzin

Like no other love on earth

From the day I first met you

Nothing can compare your worth

I will love you and protect you

With strong arms just in case

But will also hug you tenderly

With a fatherly embrace.

What more could any father want

Than a daughter so sweet and pure

There’s nothing in this world so rare

Of that I can be sure.

A dad’s love is so unique

It cannot be replaced

I will always treasure my times with you hereafter

And the memories embraced.

                                                                                                -Yours Dad

My time with her was brief and she was fast asleep in her mother’s arms. I could see my reflection in her sleepy face. I shed some tears not in front of people but silently in the comfort of my little car. Such hard and excruciating can life will sometimes be. I pledge to do everything in my capacity not to let her forget me. As of today my little Tenzin is 11 days old.

I love you Tenzin.